Dok lijek iz Zemlje niče

Živim u zemlji koja tvrdi da je demokratska. Demokracija je po definiciji vladavina naroda, ali ono što imamo jest, budimo realni oligarhija. Bolest mi je oduzela slobodu. Pretvorila me u roba. Ne mogu biti rob. Ne znam kako biti rob. Odbijam biti rob! I zato biljke rastu u mom vrtu. Zato raste lijek – za moju slobodu.

Želim  pokušati  objasniti  stanje svijesti bar jednog oboljelog od neizlječive bolesti u ovom slučaju multiple skleroze (samomrzac se sad uvija u luđačkom smijehu, a kraljica svijeta ga mrko gleda). Neka ih! U bespućima moje svijesti ima mjesta za svakog i za svašta.

„Bio sam prilično sam, ali osamljenost još uvijek nije dokaz da čovjek nema pravo.“  rekao je Krleža.

Na to se nadovezao Hesse i rekao   „ Samoća je put kojim sudbina želi čovjeka dovesti sebi samome.“

Samoća je puna Tišine koja vrišti. Prvo dugo nisam željela čuti. Gasila sam sve sklopke moje male zakržljale duše. U Tišini vreba Istina, kao zloduh, kao neman koja će vas otrgnuti od svega što vam je znano, od svega na što ste navikli, od svega što želite da Jest, ali znate da nije. Možemo lagati cijeli svijet, ali nikada ne možemo slagati vlastitu Tišinu.  Bjelodane istine postaju laž. Struktura pravila se pred vašim očima urušava kao kula od karata. U ruševinama svega što ste bili i svega što ste vjerovali da Jest, bezglavo tražite slamku spasa. Želite natrag u poznato! Poznato je prah i pepeo dopire vam do svijesti isprva kao zla slutnja, a onda kao neumoljiva činjenica.  U toj Tišini koja vrišti Istinu što sam sve mogla biti, ali eto, nisam, a sad je, čini se kasno i prekasno, ogoljela  do kosti, bez mogućnosti uzmaka, bez zaklona u pustoši, a ona vrišti i vrišti, udara  sjećanjima; kajanjem zbog propuštenih trenutaka, jer sam čekala bolje sutra, jer nisam uživala u onom zalasku sunca prije 27 godina kada sam  imala priliku sa prijateljem sjesti uz more i jednostavno voljeti život.  

Strava  preplavljuje. Molim se Svevišnjem, svemiru, svemu što možda Jest da mi oduzme razum, da blaženo zapadnem u ludilo. Ludilo, slatko ludilo! Obuzmi me! Zakrili me! Sakrij me!

 Ni poludjeti nije lako i nije svima dano.

I tad na rubu bezdana, usred svega u ničemu, jedini izbor koji  ostane jest prihvatiti tu buku Tišine, predati joj se bez rezerve, odustati od svakog pokušaja otpora, svaka Laž bit će otkrivena, svaka kalkulacija razbijena. Potonuti u golu Istinu je jedino što preostaje. Buđenja su jednako bolna kao i rađanja.  I dušom se prolomi krik koji protrese cijeli  svemir. Krik koji je sve što sam bila, što jesam i što ću ikada biti.  Sve sažeto u jednoj vibraciji velikog i vječnog Sad. Tada, tek tada esencija  iskonskog Ja prvi put vidi svjetlo dana.

I umom prolijeću zrake spoznaje…sjećanja na pokupljene životne upute, fragmenti Jastva negdje uspavani u umu, bude se.

Jednaka prava moraju imati među sobom oni koji su građani u istoj državi. 

                                                                                                                                                                        Ciceron

Priroda ne radi ništa uzalud.

                                                                                               Aristotel

Sve te misli, davno usađene i pozaspale bez reda u mom umu probudiše se, protegnuše se i istupiše na površinu. Zaposjedoše moj ego, moj glas, moje postupke, sve što Jesam, a da nisam ni znala da jesam.

 Ne vjeruj zato što je to mudrac rekao,
Ne vjeruj zato što je to uobičajeno mišljenje,
Ne vjeruj zato što je to zapisano,
Ne vjeruj zato što je to prorečeno,
Ne vjeruj zato što netko drugi to vjeruje,
Ali vjeruj sam onom što si sam prosudio da je istina.

                                                                                                                                                                                    Buddha

Moje političko stajalište je anarhizam. Pod time mislim 

 Prva uloga pravde je da nitko nikomu ne naškodi.

                                                                          Ciceron

Živim u zemlji koja tvrdi da je demokratska. Demokracija je po definiciji vladavina naroda, ali ono što imamo jest, budimo realni oligarhija.

Bolest mi je oduzela slobodu. Pretvorila me u roba.

Ne mogu biti rob. Ne znam kako biti rob. Odbijam biti rob! I zato biljke rastu u mom vrtu. Zato raste lijek – za moju slobodu.

Fil Tilen – Rob  

I slušam i vjerujem i vrištim u sebi… dok lijek iz Zemlje niče…

Minja Vuksan Dobran

2017-10-12T11:19:25+00:00

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Come nasce la droga dalla Terra

Živim u zemlji koja tvrdi da je demokratska. Demokracija je po definiciji vladavina naroda, ali ono što imamo jest, budimo realni oligarhija. Bolest mi je oduzela slobodu. Pretvorila me u roba. Ne mogu biti rob. Ne znam kako biti rob. Odbijam biti rob! I zato biljke rastu u mom vrtu. Zato raste lijek – za moju slobodu.

(više…)

2017-10-12T09:38:59+00:00

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